When not knowing squat is a good thing

I never cared for the Family Vacation movies. That hokie midwestern humor is lost on me. And besides that, Chevy Chase is only funny in real life . . . when he’s not trying to be funny at all. It’s like watching manatees trying to mate, if you’re into that kind of thing. The family vacation movies could have been condensed into a four minute youtube video with Beverly D’Angelo taking up most of the time dancing around in lingerie.

But after the arrrest warrant issued in Santa Barbara for actor Randy Quaid and his wife recently, I’d love to see the forgettable franchise return for one final weekend stay in the theaters. In yet another example of life imitating art (or is that the other way around? or does it really matter?) Randy and Mrs. Randy are being charged with squatting and vandalism. The irony being that Randy’s character in the Vacation movies is a professional squatter of sorts. The other irony being that this real life situation would bring some much needed comic relief to a movie series desperately in need of it. Of course, the greatest irony is that Chevy Chase is going to outlive all of his funnier peers.

I figure Family Vacation-3D would probably rake in around forty to fifty grand in box office, which would probably cover Randy’s bail. The wife, of course, is on her own. As was every single person who laid down a couple bucks to see the original movie in the hopes of laughing and instead left the theater wondering why life was even worth living.

And hey, what is Beverly D’Angelo up to these days?

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