I was uber motivated when I read where the just fired Charlie Winner is shopping for an intern. Now, I can’t show you the entry I submitted to internships.com cause well . . . I want to win! Dammit. (!) (?) Even though, I have a feeling Emilio Estevez has a better shot at the brass knuckle ring than I do.
So I figured I might as well hazard a guess as to what the mercury surfer is really looking for, and who is likely to win top cupcake. Come to think of it, I’m probably going to submit this ditty as well.
I am a nineteen year old coed with major league C cups and a tongue which can solve Rubiks cube. My meth addiction allows my lithe frame to channel Jimi Hendrix into your vital member and the best part is that my face hasn’t Mick Jaggered yet! I easily fit under desks, podiums and girlfriends. Bodily fluids will never evade my capture.
I can work under the table as well as on top of it.
God bless capitalism.