Into the Mitt-stic

Not for nothing, but there’s more of a chance that Tanorexic mom Patricia Krentcil gets cast in the next Twilight movie than there is of a President Mitt happening. That’s not a partisan jab, because I don’t play the holy cow card since it’s too much fun making fun of both sides.

Fact remains, Mitt’s got more ground to cover than the Yankees bullpen– against an incumbent with deep pockets.

Wendell Wilkie 2.0 status is beckoning.

So in the spirit of those beloved political sound bites made famous by YouTube, I decided to compile a list of “Mitt-icisms”. A re-imagination of what 2013 and beyond might sound like if Romney was President.

-I put a lot of time and energy into my hair, it means a lot to me

-I shop at Walmart just like you . . love that bulls-eye

-I’m a huge Kylie Minogue fan. My grandkids have all his stuff 

-Yes, Sarah Palin is a MILF. She’s definitely a Minnesotan I like more than Franken

-The death of big government is alive and well

-The war on terrorism is gonna start at my front door

-Nixon was a great President who made a tragic mistake and paid the ultimate price for it. I don’t mean death, I mean the other ultimate price

-I have no problem with differing opinions, that’s what this country was built on. Its dissent I have a problem with

-I think there is a fear of the unknown when it comes to Mormonism. I really don’t want to comment on it beyond that

-If we lose the environment, we’re in big trouble

-My first order of business is to sit down with the leaders of the Chinese government and ask the tough questions. I’m not sure when that will happen, but it will

-The idea that we will allow fear to dictate our actions is frightening

-Destruction is counter to progress, and we will destroy anyone who doesn’t feel that very same way

-Bill Gates never went to college. I think he’d be the first to tell you that having a college education is vital to success in today’s world

-In order for a nation to move forward, it must remember where it came from. We must never forget what we remember

-Every President has a dream. Washington wanted self governing colonies. Lincoln wanted freedom. Kennedy wanted to reach the moon, and Reagan wanted to visit Russia

I must confess, this post was simply a ruse. A vehicle which allowed me sneak in this Britney vid . . cause really, how else would I have gotten away with such a thing? All you music snobs, don’t judge me!

 


8 thoughts on “Into the Mitt-stic

  1. No avocado salad was left. Should’ve listened to the girl and gone a bit earlier, that’ll teach me. I did get some delicious rye bread, guarapo and falafels. My son slept in and still made out well with a shredded pork quesadilla.

  2. Ted- Nice to see you. I’d like to see a closer contest than you’re forecasting. As for whether Mitt comes off as real, well, I look at it this way . . when I look at Denise Richards, precious little of what I’m seeing is real, and yet . . I believe. Okay, that might not be a good example . . .
    As for Susie, I’ll thank her when i see her on Twitter a little later on. She challenged me to a virtual fist fight. Talk about a snowball’s chance….but wish me luck anyway.

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