Taylor Swift Breakup Songs- Alanis gave great breakup song. Pissed off, sexed up, singular. That last part is most important. The breakup song is a one shot deal, unless you’re Adam Duritz of Counting Crows. Thing is, Adam has a musical skill set that allows for him to write the been done wrong song in perpetuity. Taylor Swift doesn’t. And right when I was about to thank Michael J. Fox for telling it like it is . . .
Apologies- . . . he apologizes to Taylor Swift. Even though he meant what he said and he had every right to voice his opinion. Then the wife of Patriots receiver Wes Welker blasted Ravens LB Ray Lewis for being a hypocrite . . before apologizing. Yep, despite meaning what she had said. If you’re sensing a pattern here, then you need a life every bit as much as I do. And I ain’t apologizing for saying it . . .
Retractions- . . . because I usually mean it when I say it the first time. Unlike most anyone with a spotlight on them and five minutes worth of time with which to get in trouble. Like former Raider Tim Brown. One day he infers that his former head coach basically threw the Super Bowl, and the next day . . he says that what he said previously? He didn’t actually say. If you’re gonna make a statement- even one as ridiculous as Brown’s- own it. Yanno, like the baseball writers did . . .
Baseball Writers- Yeah, those writers who vote on Hall of Fame nominees kissed major league ass during MLB’s Cinema Paradiso when baseball history was being torched. They didn’t think to ask how it was that the thirty five year old McGwire or the previously skeletal Sosa could knock out a thirty seven year old record with ease. In the same year! And when a thirty seven year old Bonds broke McGwire’s record three years later? Nope, the writers were busy pounding the buffet spread. Fast forward to 2013. And now they make a statement. Hmmm . . .
Katie Couric, Serious Journalist- Cause, hmm is what I thought when I heard Katie was going to interview Manti Te’o and get to the bottom of a bottomless pool of facts and fiction. I thought Katie had graduated from tabloid news. But who am I to call her a sell out when Matt Lauer is still alive to do so?
And speaking of sellouts, I can’t leave out Al Gore. Who recently sold his Current TV bi’ness to that posse of straight cash homies who own Al Jazeera- This deal sucks a million different ways to Hoboken, but you know what’s most annoying? Now he has more money than God.
Believe me when I tell you, Oprah’s pissed.