Appreciating the ‘Gravity’ of this situation

gravityI don’t do reviews in the traditional sense, mostly ’cause I’m lousy at extracting the message. My son could give you a dissertation on Pulp Fiction whereas I’d say Uma looked fine and the soundtrack was silky smooth. So yeah, this review is just for fun. Sorta like George Clooney’s life.

Something I didn’t know before seeing Gravity 

A) Christian Slater can act
B) You can see the Duggar compound from space
C) The moon isn’t made of cheese
D) George Clooney has brown eyes

It’s D, and they really are quite impressive. I’m still not convinced that B and D are not true, but the story line failed to address these, so there’s that. A is complete bullshit, but my son had me kinda believing that Slater made a cameo. I’m not sure why he chooses to scare me like that. Alas, Slater never showed up- just like most every movie he has starred in.

Observations from space? Why not . . .

George Clooney is the best actor in Hollywood. When it comes to playing George Clooney. Actually, that’s not a knock on the man’s acting ability so much as a tribute to his Clark Gable-esqe ability to keep you coming back. Clooney doesn’t concern himself with method because his martini charm is big enough. Seriously, when Clooney’s in the flick? I’m happy. He was the perfect choice to play Lt. Matthew Kowalski because really, who would you rather hurtle through space with? Every time I found myself clutching at my seat, Clooney provided the calm and cool I needed in order to collect myself.

Sandra Bullock is creamy goodness. If Clooney’s magic lies in always making us want more of the same, Bullock’s capacity to play the Every Woman is even more impressive. The only thing nailed down in the flick is Bullock’s turn as Dr. Ryan Stone. She’s the Derek Jeter of actresses in that she is often overlooked until she starts playing. Then you get to see what intangibles actually look like. 

Bullock and Clooney together is the tastiest idea since donuts met crullers. When the ingredients include floating in space, astronaut suits, Clooney love stories and Sandra Bullock showing off her celestial body . . how can you go wrong? Not even Christian Slater could screw that up, I don’t think.

And by the way kids, you inspired me to crank up a Miley interview for tomorrow night. It’s my first fake interview in years . . . whereas Miley? Does ’em all the time. 


34 thoughts on “Appreciating the ‘Gravity’ of this situation

      • *puts on geek hat*
        At some point in Star Trek 6, the Enterprise is off on it’s own. the Excelsior (Under Sulu) gets a message from Start Fleet asking if they know where it is.
        Sulu is in his quarters when the message comes in. Christian Slater delivers it. The whole scene is probably under a minute.

        And now I’ve outed myself.

        • Dude,
          You are like, the coolest person I know. I’m basing that entirely on your surfing skill set, your music acumen and your brilliant ability to go bumper sticker sexy- as per “Yard Sale”.
          So this Star Trek thing? I’m willing to look the other way.

  1. Want to see it at iMax theatre! So hoping I don’t throw up like i did at the last iMax outing…”The Living Sea”…and I got seasick. Who does that?! So embarrassing, I can just NOW walk around in my town anonymously.

    Love me some Clooney (I love his humor most) and Bullock is my favorite actress ( since “While you were sleeping”)! I’m betting on greatness for this film!

    I’m pacing the halls waiting for the Miley review.

    • They were showing it at the IMAX here and my son was the one who saved my ass by reminding me that I got queasy watching “Dark Knight” on IMAX. Damn good thing I didn’t see it on IMAX because when you ask “Who does that?”….I would have been raising my hand to answer “THIS guy”…
      Bullock in “While you were Sleeping,”? A classic.
      Miley is all written and ready for launch this evening. I’m so excited, and I just can’t hide it . . wait, why am I channeling the Pointer Sisters?

      • Thanks to this comment, I went looking for a mashup with the Pointer Sisters. Those fine ladies always send me back to the best places. Whenever I hear them, I go time traveling to those ’79 Pirates and the Beverly Hills Cop flick (the funny one). What’s not to love about that?
        And so, from there, it was a hop, skip and jump to 50 cent . . cause I love to run to his stuff. I really do.
        Here’s the baby they made together. It’s like “Hart to Hart” met “The Wire” in a back alley, and they birthed . . .hmm, I don’t know . . . Miley Cyrus?
        Crap. I picked the wrong night to get lazy on my vodka supply. Oh freaking well.
        PS- I ran to this mashup. And looooooved it.
        PS2- Yanno, maybe I AM as lame as my kids take me for . . .

  2. You’ll get swept up into it right away, and it most likely won’t let you go. That’s the type of film this is and that’s why it works so well. Nice review.

    • CMok,
      Keep bringing it, brother. And consider me swept. I was. As if Carl Sagan kidnapped me and stuck me in the hatch of his AMC Gremlin. Oh crap, sorry. That’s the nightmare I had last night, and a different post . . . entirely.

      Seriously. Come back. You’ll enjoy it here. Promise.

  3. Duuuuuuuuuuuuuude. I haven’t seen it yet but it is definitely on the list along with Captain Phillips. And I agree with you about Sandra Bullock I totally think she is awesome in the roles that she’s been choosing lately. She’s definitely the Derek Jeter of actresses hopefully she gets a nod for this role 🙂

  4. Confession: I only scanned this post because I didn’t want it to spoil anything for me before I saw the movie. But I saw Slater mentioned, then I saw you and Guap discussing him, and since I love me some ‘Pump Up the Volume’ Slater, I was very excited to see him in Gravity.

    So a couple days ago I saw the flick, and I kept waiting. and waiting, and waiting. Thinking, maybe he’ll be the one that comes to rescue Sandra.

    LOL, you had me going!

    But you’re right. Clooney has gorgeous eyes. And Sandra kicks ass.

    • Hey mama,

      Don’t hate on me for picking on Slater. I loved him some in “Heathers”, after which I just could NOT get over the Jack Nicholson impersonation I was feeling from him.

      You really thought Slater was gonna be in “Gravity”? That . . . is, awesome! I love that. Hey, blame that one on my son. He was the one who had ME going on the Slater cameo. That little bastard has a sense of humor that, umm, okay . . . it’s my fault.

      • I feel pretty confident saying I could never hate you. Or even if I could, I wouldn’t.

        And yes, dammit, I seriously thought he was going to be in it. (I thought if anything his voice would come on the radio when she was stuck in the ISS.) That’s what I get for scanning–normally I savor every crazy, beautiful, delicious word you write, but I didn’t want spoilers. Ended up I still got “spoiled” but at least the anticipation was sweet.

  5. ‘Clooney doesn’t concern himself with method because his martini charm is big enough.’

    Love it!

    I had to look up Derek Jater – -and it still means nothing – – baseball to me is ‘well-paid’ rounders 🙂

    Ah, well – to mis-quote Shaw/Wilde/whoever . . ‘two drinkers separated by a common language’

    • Glad you liked that take on Clooney. As for Jeter, he’s the American version of Beckham . . and yes, he is an extremely well paid rounder. I like that word, ’rounder’…..very cool. I’m gonna use that to confuse the hell out of my friends, not that they need the help.
      And thanks for the misquote, to which I agree wholeheartedly.

  6. Don’t know about confusing your friends…. I think I’ve confused you . . . . Rounders is the name given to a sort of ‘junior’ baseball style game usually played in primary schools …. Though it is also played by adults.

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